Keeping Perspective

People often ask me....."what's the hardest part about being a single parent?" Or, they will say, "it must be so hard to be a single parent."

Truth be told, I don't think it's that hard.....even on my roughest days...it seems like it's just normal...it's just what I/we do. I do it all (all daily stuff, wash, morning routine, make lunches, bedtime routine, etc.). And-because I don't have a partner - I don't get bitter about the fact that "no one is helping me."

I am a night owl.....if I had my way, I would go to bed at midnight and get up at 8 am. Another hard thing about being a parent? I don't get to choose what her biorhythms are/when she gets up. I have an early bird. She prefers to get up at 6:15 am. After a short stint of getting up later due to daylight savings (which I LOVED), she is now back to her 6:00-6:15 am wake up call. This doesn't work for a mama that likes to go to bed at midnight.

In terms of perspective, I recently talked to a good friend/colleague who told me that professionals are evaluating her son for some sort of diagnosis on the autism spectrum. She shared with me many of his behaviors and, due to my in depth work with kids with autism it does seem like he is on the autism spectrum albeit maybe a mild case. I asked her if he said "mama" and she said no. He also doesn't socially reference (e.g., when he's excited about something he doesn't look at others to join in the fun). His language is delayed and she mentioned that he uses people as "objects" vs. asking for people by name to help him.

On top of this, I was at a park the other day when a woman was pushing a rather small child on a swing. She told me he was adopted and, he happened to be older than Mila but had a "stomach disorder" where he needed to be on feeding tubes 22+ hours a day. She told me he ultimately needed a stomach transplant if that was ever in the foreseeable scientific future as he could not absorb nutrients with his current stomach.

Back to Mila. She gets up between 6-6:15 am and I am just livid with how little sleep I have gotten due to my late night bedtime. I often get her up, put her in the living room with milk/a snack and a show (Elmo or Yo Gabba Gabba) and then go back to bed to lay down, get a few more minutes of sleep.

After about 15-20 minutes....Mila comes in and says "mama up, mama up" which usually irritates the heck out of me. Since hearing about my friend's son and the woman at the park...I have to say....it puts things into perspective for me. Yes, my child gets up WAY TOO EARLY for me but.....she does say "mama," comes and gets me to tell me she wants/misses me and has no issues related to feeding. When I am exhausted.....totally exhausted....I now just hug her tight when she says "mama up," and I am thankful for my sweet, loveable, good eater who wakes up too darn early :)

Perspective is a good thing!